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Let me start by saying that addressing2 gossip is something I have never done. I don’t like to give energy to the business of lies， but I wanted to participate in a larger conversation that has already begun and needs to continue. Since I’m not on social media， I decided to put my thoughts here in writing.
For the record， I am not pregnant. What I am is fed up3. I’m fed up with the sport-like scrutiny and body shaming that occurs daily under the guise of“journalism，” the “First Amendment” and “celebrity news.”4
Every day my husband and I are harassed by dozens of aggressive photographers staked outside our home who will go to shocking lengths to obtain any kind of photo， even if it means endangering us or the unlucky pedestrians who happen to be nearby.5 But setting aside the public safety aspect， I want to focus on the bigger picture of what this insane tabloid ritual represents to all of us.6
If I am some kind of symbol to some people out there， then clearly I am an example of the lens through which we， as a society， view our mothers， daughters， sisters， wives， female friends and colleagues.7 The objectification and scrutiny we put women through is absurd and disturbing.8 The way I am portrayed by the media is simply a reflection of how we see and portray women in general， measured against some warped9 standard of beauty. Sometimes cultural standards just need a different perspective so we can see them for what they really are—a collective acceptance... a subconscious agreement. We are in charge of our agreement. Little girls everywhere are absorbing our agreement， passive or otherwise. And it begins early. The message that girls are not pretty unless they’re incredibly thin， that they’re not worthy of our attention unless they look like a supermodel or an actress on the cover of a magazine is something we’re all willingly buying into10. This conditioning11 is something girls then carry into womanhood. We use celebrity “news” to perpetuate this dehumanizing view of females， focused solely on one’s physical appearance， which tabloids turn into a sporting event of speculation.12 Is she pregnant？ Is she eating too much？ Has she let herself go13？ Is her marriage on the rocks because the camera detects some physical “imperfection”？14
I used to tell myself that tabloids were like comic books， not to be taken seriously， just a soap opera for people to follow when they need a distraction15. But I really can’t tell myself that anymore because the reality is the stalking16 and objectification I’ve experienced first-hand， going on decades now， reflects the warped way we calculate a woman’s worth. This past month in particular has illuminated for me how much we define a woman’s value based on her marital and maternal status.17 The sheer amount of resources being spent right now by press trying to simply uncover whether or not I am pregnant （for the bajillionth time... but who’s counting） points to the perpetuation of this notion that women are somehow incomplete， unsuccessful， or unhappy if they’re not married with children.18 In this last boring news cycle about my personal life there have been mass shootings， wildfires，major decisions by the Supreme Court， an upcoming election， and any number of more newsworthy issues that “journalists” could dedicate their resources towards.19
Here’s where I come out on this topic： we are complete with or without a mate， with or without a child. We get to decide for ourselves what is beautiful when it comes to our bodies. That decision is ours and ours alone. Let’s make that decision for ourselves and for the young women in this world who look to us as examples. Let’s make that decision consciously， outside of the tabloid noise. We don’t need to be married or mothers to be complete. We get to determine our own “happily ever after” for ourselves.
I have grown tired of being part of this narrative20. Yes， I may become a mother some day， and since I’m laying it all out21 there， if I ever do， I will be the first to let you know. But I’m not in pursuit of motherhood because I feel incomplete in some way， as our celebrity news culture would lead us all to believe. I resent being made to feel “less than” because my body is changing and/or I had a burger for lunch and was photographed from a weird angle and therefore deemed one of two things： “pregnant” or “fat.”Not to mention the painful awkwardness that comes with being congratulated by friends， coworkers and strangers alike on one’s fictional pregnancy （often a dozen times in a single day）.
From years of experience， I’ve learned tabloid practices， however dangerous， will not change， at least not any time soon. What can change is our awareness and reaction to the toxic messages buried within these seemingly harmless stories served up as truth and shaping our ideas of who we are.22 We get to decide how much we buy into what’s being served up， and maybe some day the tabloids will be forced to see the world through a different， more humanized lens because consumers have just stopped buying the bullshit.
1. for the record： 正式或明確地说，郑重声明。 2. address： 处理，应对。
3. be fed up： 此处是双关语，既可指吃饱，吃胖了，也指厌烦，受够了。
4. 我受够了在“新闻业”、“第一修正案”以及各种“名人新闻”的伪装下，每天经受的娱乐记者的审视和人身羞辱。scrutiny： 仔细检查，审视；under the guise of： 在……的伪装下；First Amendment： 美国宪法第一修正案，禁止美国国会制定任何法律以确立国教、妨碍宗教信仰自由、剥夺言论自由、侵犯新闻自由与集会自由、干扰或禁止向政府请愿的权利。其中新闻自由一条保证了各种资讯和观点得以自由出版的权利，并且适用于各种媒体。
5. 每天我和我的丈夫都会被很多穷追不舍的摄影师骚扰，他们每天蹲守在我家门口，不擇手段地获取任何照片，即使这照片会对我们以及不幸入镜的路人造成危害。harass： 骚扰，侵扰；stake out： 监视，在……外守候；go to（great， extreme， etc.）lengths： 不择手段，不遗余力；endanger：危及，危害；pedestrian： 行人。
6. set aside： 把……撇开；tabloid： 小报；ritual： 惯例，老规矩。
7. 如果我对那些人来说是一种象征，那么很显然，通过镜头中的我你们就能看出这个社会是怎样看待我们的母亲、女儿、姐妹、妻子、女性朋友以及同事的。lens：（相机的）镜头。
8. objectification： 具体化；put through： 使经受。
9. warped： 古怪的，扭曲的。
10. buy into： 接受。
11. conditioning： n. 熏陶，训练。
12. perpetuate： 使长存，使永恒，后文perpetuation为名词；dehumanizing：非人道的；sporting：〈口〉冒险的，没把握的；speculation： 猜测，推测。
13. let oneself go： 放纵自己。
14. on the rocks：（婚姻）濒于破裂的；detect： 察觉，发现。
15. distraction： 消遣。
16. stalking： 暗中尾随，跟踪。
17. marital： 婚姻的；maternal： 母亲的。
18. 媒体耗费大量资源仅仅为了去证实我是否怀孕了（无数次了……但谁又会去数它），这一现象表明了长久以来的一个观念，即不结婚生子，女人就不完整、不成功和不快乐。sheer amount： 巨大的数量；the bajillionth time： 第无数次。
19. mass shootings： 大规模枪击事件； wildfire： 火灾；Supreme Court：（美国）联邦最高法院；upcoming： 即将来临的；newsworthy： 有报道价值的。
20. narrative： 报道。
21. lay out： 摆出，摊开。
22. toxic： 有毒的，有害的；serve up： 提供，献上。
For the record， I am not pregnant. What I am is fed up3. I’m fed up with the sport-like scrutiny and body shaming that occurs daily under the guise of“journalism，” the “First Amendment” and “celebrity news.”4
Every day my husband and I are harassed by dozens of aggressive photographers staked outside our home who will go to shocking lengths to obtain any kind of photo， even if it means endangering us or the unlucky pedestrians who happen to be nearby.5 But setting aside the public safety aspect， I want to focus on the bigger picture of what this insane tabloid ritual represents to all of us.6
If I am some kind of symbol to some people out there， then clearly I am an example of the lens through which we， as a society， view our mothers， daughters， sisters， wives， female friends and colleagues.7 The objectification and scrutiny we put women through is absurd and disturbing.8 The way I am portrayed by the media is simply a reflection of how we see and portray women in general， measured against some warped9 standard of beauty. Sometimes cultural standards just need a different perspective so we can see them for what they really are—a collective acceptance... a subconscious agreement. We are in charge of our agreement. Little girls everywhere are absorbing our agreement， passive or otherwise. And it begins early. The message that girls are not pretty unless they’re incredibly thin， that they’re not worthy of our attention unless they look like a supermodel or an actress on the cover of a magazine is something we’re all willingly buying into10. This conditioning11 is something girls then carry into womanhood. We use celebrity “news” to perpetuate this dehumanizing view of females， focused solely on one’s physical appearance， which tabloids turn into a sporting event of speculation.12 Is she pregnant？ Is she eating too much？ Has she let herself go13？ Is her marriage on the rocks because the camera detects some physical “imperfection”？14
I used to tell myself that tabloids were like comic books， not to be taken seriously， just a soap opera for people to follow when they need a distraction15. But I really can’t tell myself that anymore because the reality is the stalking16 and objectification I’ve experienced first-hand， going on decades now， reflects the warped way we calculate a woman’s worth. This past month in particular has illuminated for me how much we define a woman’s value based on her marital and maternal status.17 The sheer amount of resources being spent right now by press trying to simply uncover whether or not I am pregnant （for the bajillionth time... but who’s counting） points to the perpetuation of this notion that women are somehow incomplete， unsuccessful， or unhappy if they’re not married with children.18 In this last boring news cycle about my personal life there have been mass shootings， wildfires，major decisions by the Supreme Court， an upcoming election， and any number of more newsworthy issues that “journalists” could dedicate their resources towards.19
Here’s where I come out on this topic： we are complete with or without a mate， with or without a child. We get to decide for ourselves what is beautiful when it comes to our bodies. That decision is ours and ours alone. Let’s make that decision for ourselves and for the young women in this world who look to us as examples. Let’s make that decision consciously， outside of the tabloid noise. We don’t need to be married or mothers to be complete. We get to determine our own “happily ever after” for ourselves.
I have grown tired of being part of this narrative20. Yes， I may become a mother some day， and since I’m laying it all out21 there， if I ever do， I will be the first to let you know. But I’m not in pursuit of motherhood because I feel incomplete in some way， as our celebrity news culture would lead us all to believe. I resent being made to feel “less than” because my body is changing and/or I had a burger for lunch and was photographed from a weird angle and therefore deemed one of two things： “pregnant” or “fat.”Not to mention the painful awkwardness that comes with being congratulated by friends， coworkers and strangers alike on one’s fictional pregnancy （often a dozen times in a single day）.
From years of experience， I’ve learned tabloid practices， however dangerous， will not change， at least not any time soon. What can change is our awareness and reaction to the toxic messages buried within these seemingly harmless stories served up as truth and shaping our ideas of who we are.22 We get to decide how much we buy into what’s being served up， and maybe some day the tabloids will be forced to see the world through a different， more humanized lens because consumers have just stopped buying the bullshit.
1. for the record： 正式或明確地说，郑重声明。 2. address： 处理，应对。
3. be fed up： 此处是双关语，既可指吃饱，吃胖了，也指厌烦，受够了。
4. 我受够了在“新闻业”、“第一修正案”以及各种“名人新闻”的伪装下，每天经受的娱乐记者的审视和人身羞辱。scrutiny： 仔细检查，审视；under the guise of： 在……的伪装下；First Amendment： 美国宪法第一修正案，禁止美国国会制定任何法律以确立国教、妨碍宗教信仰自由、剥夺言论自由、侵犯新闻自由与集会自由、干扰或禁止向政府请愿的权利。其中新闻自由一条保证了各种资讯和观点得以自由出版的权利，并且适用于各种媒体。
5. 每天我和我的丈夫都会被很多穷追不舍的摄影师骚扰，他们每天蹲守在我家门口，不擇手段地获取任何照片，即使这照片会对我们以及不幸入镜的路人造成危害。harass： 骚扰，侵扰；stake out： 监视，在……外守候；go to（great， extreme， etc.）lengths： 不择手段，不遗余力；endanger：危及，危害；pedestrian： 行人。
6. set aside： 把……撇开；tabloid： 小报；ritual： 惯例，老规矩。
7. 如果我对那些人来说是一种象征，那么很显然，通过镜头中的我你们就能看出这个社会是怎样看待我们的母亲、女儿、姐妹、妻子、女性朋友以及同事的。lens：（相机的）镜头。
8. objectification： 具体化；put through： 使经受。
9. warped： 古怪的，扭曲的。
10. buy into： 接受。
11. conditioning： n. 熏陶，训练。
12. perpetuate： 使长存，使永恒，后文perpetuation为名词；dehumanizing：非人道的；sporting：〈口〉冒险的，没把握的；speculation： 猜测，推测。
13. let oneself go： 放纵自己。
14. on the rocks：（婚姻）濒于破裂的；detect： 察觉，发现。
15. distraction： 消遣。
16. stalking： 暗中尾随，跟踪。
17. marital： 婚姻的；maternal： 母亲的。
18. 媒体耗费大量资源仅仅为了去证实我是否怀孕了（无数次了……但谁又会去数它），这一现象表明了长久以来的一个观念，即不结婚生子，女人就不完整、不成功和不快乐。sheer amount： 巨大的数量；the bajillionth time： 第无数次。
19. mass shootings： 大规模枪击事件； wildfire： 火灾；Supreme Court：（美国）联邦最高法院；upcoming： 即将来临的；newsworthy： 有报道价值的。
20. narrative： 报道。
21. lay out： 摆出，摊开。
22. toxic： 有毒的，有害的；serve up： 提供，献上。